Ask Sarah-“Why hasn’t he called?”

Posted on November 21, 2011


Question: I really like this guy. He talks to me a bunch when we are together and then he says he’ll call, but he never follows through. I don’t understand. What should I do?

Why wait?

Many girls and guys have this problem. They wait by their phone, hoping the name of that cutie from around the block comes across the screen.

He hasn’t called and you’re starting to wonder why. Well, there are many reasons people fail to pick up the phone. He could be busy, his phone could be shut off, he may have written down the wrong digit, or maybe he is just scared.

He could be afraid to really show himself to you because he doesn’t want to get “played.”  He may look at your friendship and be scared to ruin it by saying something wrong. He also may be worried about appearing clingy because he doesn’t want you to look at him as a “loser” or “desperate.”

Dr. John Gray, author of Mars and Venus on a Date, said, “Men are like emotional camels.” Oh yeah, he just compared his own kind to a two humped, smelly animal that walks around a desert. What he meant though is that men can go awhile without feelings, dating someone, or being involved in any relationship.

Now, the harsh part is what he could also be saying by not calling. Maybe he’s just not that into you. Maybe somewhere along the line you’ve done or said something that has pushed him away. Then there’s the last possibility. If he doesn’t call, he doesn’t care.

In the end though, every guy doesn’t call for numerous reasons. You should take charge and call him once or twice. Don’t go and wait by the phone. Him not calling isn’t the problem-what you’re doing when the phone isn’t ringing is. You need to do something that will make you feel good and bring you one step closer to finding someone who knows how to pick up the phone.

Do you really want someone who makes you wait for him to call? Waiting around for Prince Charming to make a move will only leave you as a lonely Cinderella.

Reported by Sarah Braun

Posted in: Ask Sarah